Super Confidence Part II

The delegates who come to my talks and seminars still never cease to amaze me. Even if they tend to average out into distinct types when subjected to the specific criteria I discuss, the individuality they each bring with them is a constant source of interest and fascination to me and their input to those events helps make each one special; unique experiences brought to life by the shared interaction of inimitable people.

To a great extent, it is the people who come to these events that provide them with their meaning. So, I want to tell you about a recent experience I had with a group of delegates in the hope of sharing a little bit of the meaning they shared with each other, with you…

At my recent Super Confidence seminar I asked the group if any of them had the confidence to stand up, in my place, and address the room for a short time. As I expected, about a third of the group (tellingly including all of the men in the room) stood up, as bold as brass, and volunteered. Some of them will have made this choice through genuine confidence, and some through a sense of feeling it the right thing to do. Either way, I was left with a group of outwardly confident individuals, who jumped at the chance of a bit of public speaking, and a group of outwardly less confident individuals, who’s reasons for not wanting to be included ranged from unpleasant physical reactions to a sense of the unexpected being an unwelcome addition to their day.

Those who did choose to speak brought some interesting insight to the room, revealing why they felt they had the confidence to stand up in front of a group of strangers:

Delegate one: “I am actually taking myself out of my comfort zone… I thought, what on earth am I going to talk about? Because that’s what it’s all about, talking about something you know about and feel comfortable with. Strangely enough, I feel confident talking about myself, so that’s what I’ll do. I think confidence is about feeling good about yourself. If you feel good about yourself, and you feel happy, you portray that on the outside. I am, genuinely, a happy person and I think that comes across. And that’s what I put confidence down to.”

Delegate two: “I wanted to come on this course today because, although I look outwardly confident, I remember being the same height I am now when I was fifteen. I grew up being the tallest in my class, absolutely towering over boys and feeling very very under confident in myself. This lasted until I was in my late teens and then I thought, ‘do you know what? Sod it. I don’t care what you think about me because I feel really good in myself’. Some days you will feel confident and other days you will have paper bag days. And on those days you will think ‘how am I going to get through this?’ But you do, because you reach inside yourself and you think, ‘I know I’m fantastic and I’m going to tell everybody how fantastic I am’. And that’s what confidence is all about.”

Delegate three: “I want to talk about living your dream. Don’t wait until you’re too old to live it or until the risks are manageable. Just get out and do what you want to do. If you wait, you will die. It is a fact, guaranteed. So before you die, get on with what you really want to do. It’s worth it.”

Delegate four: “Everything that we do is selling either ourselves, or selling a product. We are always selling. This selling is the transfer of enthusiasm. If you are enthusiastic you will sell yourself and whatever else you want to sell, confidently.”

So, what are the fundamental differences between these types of people? What is it about a person that allows them to exude so much confidence while others lack such outwardly expressed self-assurance?

Check back next week for my next blog, in which I will reveal what I think these differences are and introduce several techniques you can use in order to develop your Personal Power Pack to the level you want it to be at.